Stories I Tell My Grandchildren
- #2
Thor and His Goats
An Adaptation of
Northern Lore For The Young
“Pop,” Mason asked, “Will you
tell me another story about Thor?” It
was a rainy Sunday in Texas ,
and Northern Winds put a chill into the air.
“Sure,” I said with a bit of
caution. The new Thor movie had just
been released amid much fanfare and I was positive that the little guy had some
questions. I attempted to head off the
questions with what I knew.
“First things should always be
first, Mason. The real Thor has red hair
and a bushy red beard, not blonde. He is
ruggedly handsome; Thor does not look like a clean-shaven, male fashion
model. Daddy Odin never kicked him out
of Asgard and Sif is his loving wife, not a movie character who looks like a
cross between Wonder Woman and Zina, Warrior Princess. Plus, Sif is blonde!”
“But Pop,” Mason strained, with a
question stuck in this throat, “Why is the movie wrong?”
“Well Mason, it’s not as much as
the movie being wrong as it is about money.
The people who made the movie know what sells at the box-office. They know that a blonde, clean-shaven guy
appeals to more people than a big, red headed dude with a beard. So, they put on the movie screen what people want
to see.”
“And they make more money?”
“Yes Mason, a lot of money.”
“So they make a lot of money by telling the wrong
story?”
“Well, they really make a lot of
money by showing people what they want to see – the truth doesn’t matter.”
The little guy had a puzzled look
on his face; he’s only five years old.
When I told him that he would understand better when he was older, his
puzzled look changed to a blank stare.
That did not last long.
He laughed with delight as he said, “Thor really flies good
with his hammer!”
Again, I had to burst a
movie-made bubble. “Mason, Thor does not
use his hammer to fly. He uses his
hammer to smash trolls and giants. When
he throws his hammer so it can do its’ work, it always comes back to him.”
“But Pop, how does Thor fly?
Does he use an airplane?” You
just have to love five year olds.
When I stopped smiling, I
casually said, “When our friend Thor needs to fly, he uses his cart, pulled by
his two goats.”
“A cart and two goats?
Like the goats we saw at the neighbor’s farm?”
“Thor’s goats are very special,
Mason. They are much bigger and stronger
than what we saw the other day at the farm.
Well, they have to be if they lug Thor around the Multiverse in his
cart! And, they look more like mountain
rams, with big, curled horns.”
“Do Thor’s goats have names?”
“Yes they do! Thor calls them Toothnasher and
Toothgrinder. And, he is very protective
of his magical goats.”
“The goats are magical Pop?”
“Absolutely Mason! As I said before, they have to be magically
strong so they can pull Thor around in his cart and take him where he needs to
go. And when he gets hungry, his goats
help him.”
“The goats go to Kroger and get stuff for Thor to eat?”
“No Mason, but that would be a
neat trick! Let me tell you a story and
you will understand. Long ago, Thor was
out and about within the Multiverse on Asgard business. And of course, Toothgrinder and Toothnasher
were with him, pulling his cart. He
stopped in Midgard for the night and was very hungry. So, he ate one of his goats, and carefully
laid out the bones, so he could bring it back to life in the morning; this was
another way his goats help him. Thor did
this many times and always was successful bringing the goat back to life; they
were perfect. He just put his hammer
over the bones, said a word or two, and there was his goat, healthy and sturdy
as before. But on that particular
morning, things did not happen in the usual way.” I paused to take a sip of my adult
beverage.
“What happened Pop?”
When I put down my glass, I
continued. “As soon as his goat came
back to life, Thor noticed that the goat was lame; the poor guy could hardly
walk and running was out of the question.
Our big red-bearded guy was very angry; he knew that somebody messed
around with the bones when he was sleeping.
Soon, Thor discovered that a little boy and girl had played with the
bones – they were about your age! So, he
ate the goat again, laid out the bones in the proper manner, and brought the
goat back to life. His goat was perfect,
as it was supposed to be. Then, he
scooped up the boy and girl, put them into his cart, and went to his home in
Asgard.” Again, another pause for a sip
of my beverage; I knew what was coming.
“Pop,” Mason asked, “Did Thor hurt the little boy and
girl?”
“No, but he wanted to teach them
a lesson. Thankfully for those two kids,
Thor talked over his plan with his wife, Sif.
Sif thought that Thor’s plan was too harsh and convinced him to let her
deal with the kids. She put the boy and
girl to work, doing some minor chores around their home in Asgard. So tell me Mason, did you learn anything from
this story?”
“Ah…….not to play with stuff that’s not yours ‘cause you
will get into trouble?”
“Yes, that’s it.”
“Pop, can you tell me a story about Sif, Thor’s wife?”
“I have the perfect story for you
but that will have to wait for another time.
Now, it’s nap time.”
“Awh Pop!”
Copyright @2013 Terry
Unger
