Saturday, August 10, 2013

False Friends

Our modern world has a few pitfalls.  One of them is the addiction to being "connected and on-line."  Another, I believe, is friendship, or what we think real friendship is.  People "like" us, on-line and in real life, and want to be with us.  Why is that?  There are many people who want our attention.  If they want our attention, then probably, they are interested in other things.  Words from my innocent youth still ring true in my ears.

When I was a mere boy of 9 or 10 years, a neighborhood chum's mother told me something that, at the time, I thought to be rather strange.  She told me that I would be very lucky if I had one or two real friends during my lifetime.  She was right; now I understand that wisdom.

A true friend, a real friend, stands by you through thick and thin, joy and adversity, and only wants the same from you.  It would be nice if that was a universally recognized axiom.  However, modern human behavior, the hurrah for me and the hell with you, tells a different story.

Many people but not all (thank the gods) are out for themselves and are not shy about using the concept of friendship to achieve their goals.  Then there are others who sleepwalk through their life and are not aware of their actions.  However, consciously or unconsciously, sleepwalking or not, using friendship to further your own goals is unconscionable.  And then some do not have any goals.

Many people want to live their lives vicariously through others and friendship is the way that they suck the life and more out of people.  When the parties have stopped, the BBQ's end, and you stop sending gifts to their kids on their birthdays, these people forget that you exist.  Oh, and how they are offended!  And yet, there is another reason for these false friends to throttle you.

Your opinions about a thing or two have changed.  This upsets the bloodsuckers because within their vicarious selves, you are connected to something else, something greater than you, in their estimation, that they admire; you are their personal conduit.  Your change offends them; in many ways, you have cut them off from that something else.  When this happens, these false friends, these bloodsuckers, waste no time in publicly and privately condemning you.  These people are and certainly never were your friends.  They should be classified as parasites along for the ride (or barnacles to be scraped off a ship) and when the ride abruptly ends, they are pissed at you, like it's all your fault.  Baloney.  Again, people of this nature are not your friends.  People or this type want to live vicariously off of others because they lack the courage to live their lives on their own merit and  admit who they truly are.    

When people mask their intentions, sleepwalking or not, they certainly do not have your best interests at heart; it's all about them and what they want, consciously or unconsciously.  Here is a litmus test.  When a real life boogeyman  beats down your door, who is there to stand by your side, tuck you in at night, tell you that all things will work out, and that you are a good person?  Guaranteed, you can count them on one hand, minus the thumb and the pinkey finger.   

                                                 Copyright @2013 Terry Unger      



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